Sunday, December 19, 2010

1-Year Anniversary!

Today marks the 1-year anniversary of 75/09's commissioning! yay (: HAPPY ANNIVERSARY! To myself and everyone else haha. And aptly, it occured to me this morning to consider applying for SAFOS and signing on HAHAHA. Obviously it would be obnoxious to think that it would be that easy to get, but I thought why not try anyway. BUT then I'd have to spend 21 weeks (or maybe slightly less) to re-vocate before waiting for an interview. I guess the desire to return to militarisation stems from the joy derived from my job the past year. Or rather the moments of contentment and satisfaction from seeing some result of the effort put in over the months of training and in trying to revamp the way things are done and to instil some form of system in the unit. Like how I was quite happy to see how some of my 11th LOCC cadets have matured and grown in character yesterday during the Cert Presentation Ceremony. Oh well we shall see how things work out.

Anyway its been amazing how the past year has gone by so quickly (in retrospect) while it felt like time was crawling in camp. Haha and I'm reasonably glad at what we've been able to achieve in that time and how much we've learnt and matured/grown throughout all the RUBBISH we were put through. And the fun times of course (:

Looking back, more than a year ago, when the dreaded posting order was announced and fate was sealed, I could have just gone into depression. Until I saw another friend who was possibly more crushed than I was. Honestly, I never really imagined working with melvin before, even though he was my syndicate mate for 5 months plus, so that didn't really help. so seeing there was nothing to be done, I could only pray for strength, both mental and physical, to endure all the stress and pain a training institute had to offer, and for wisdom to know how to deal with my work, the people I work with, and the people I work for. Then there was chris, who told me one night on MSN that instructorship was probably not a bad job match for me, since I'd liked to teach/coach/instruct since RI days when I was SL, and maybe I would be happier dealing with cadets instead of men. And I thought maybe he had a point. By that time, I'd gotten so used to and annoyed with coursemates and instructors alike who kept badgering me with the prospect of returning to face 10th and 11th LOCC, Lancer, Starlight etc. 2 more times. Much like what we did to Shi Xuan and Gabriel in the coming graduating course. Hmm maybe I should have done this reflection earlier so they wouldn't have been subject to such suffering. Oh well all part and parcel of the LOCC instructor tradition haha :D

As God would have it, I was given the best opportunity to fulfil my primary ambition of making the biggest influence I could on those I interacted with during my term of service, having taken 2 batches of LOCC, and my secondary one of effecting some improvement in my unit, seeing the many imperfections in the running of LOCC. Thank God for his perfect plan in my life that I always fail to see before it materialises. Of course, these were just opportunities for me to achieve my personal goals in NS, and there were indeed countless occasions when things and people got so frustrating that it seemed foolish to carry on caring so much, when we were just NSF serving our obligatory time. Night times in bunk became the griping and complaining sessions for Melvin and myself as time and time again we wondered out loud why we threw our whole selves into doing our work and even doing more than we had to, when it seemed a fool's errand that wouldn't last and wasn't even appreciated. In the end, I believe it was worth it, even though many of our endeavours remain incomplete due to our short year there. Like how I really miss taking cadets now sigh >.< Naturally, it took the encouragement of friends and family to keep me going too. For example such as like for example I would text Wayne or Weiren or Quan or some other close friend "SIANNN. I hate my job. Life is tough." and he/she would reply something encouraging like "Tough is like a walnut. ORD lo!" then I would immerse myself in work with new found energy for a while before the cycle repeated itself. Haha ok no the messaging was deeper than that duh -.- So for these friends I'm very grateful (: Most of the time though, I'd just roll over to Melvin's cubicle (or shout over if I felt nua like an over-ripe banana) and rant for a while before continuing with work. I must say that we complement each other very well, which enabled us to be so effective in the office haha XD Yeah, well so come to think of it I owe Melvin too for listening to me all those times and joining me in the ranting hahaha.

My main regret this year is that I didn't spend enough time with my friends from school/chorale I guess, because of the amount of time I dedicated to NS. Which sucks because when I started getting together with them again, it seemed like I didn't know much that was going on in their lives at all. Sigh. Hopefully that will change with significantly more free time now.

Analysis of your own behaviour and thought process is very good for self-reflection and change :D

I've spent way too long on this post. Need to go write letters. And bake brownie cake for my ex-course comd hahahaha. Til the next time I feel driven to post! :)

whizzer; 3:52:00 pm